Time For Farting
When You Should Never Fart
- Inside a crowded elevator.
- In the supervisor's office, when you're in a meeting.
- In your own office.
- In a crowded supermarket or grocery store.
- Inside a public library.
- On a crowded train or bus.
- On an airplane.
- While giving a speech.
- While listening to a speech.
- While attending Church.
- During confession.
- While on a date.
- At a cinema or movie theater.
- While standing in line to get a ticket to a movie or a play.
- In a walk-in freezer. It'll linger a while.
- In the bed, while feeling frisky.
- In the bed, while being frisky.
- While fighting fire in a burning building.
- In a patrol car for a minor violation.
When It's Okay To Fart
- In an empty elevator before you get off.
- The supervisor's office as you are about to leave. It's best to make sure it's silent but deadly.
- Your co-workers cubicle at the office.
- In the cashier's line. It's bound to speed things up.
- When you're reading fart jokes, obviously.
- In a bathroom or restroom, obviously.
- While on a blind date, if you want to end it early.
- In the dressing next to an occupied one. There's no doubt the room next to you will quickly become unoccupied.
- When deep sea diving. It's fun to watch bubbles float to the surface from two different origins.
- Back seat of the patrol car after being arrested.
- In your car, just before you get carjacked. The carjacker might change his mind when he opens the door.
- In your car, after you've been carjacked. The carjacker might get out.
- During any kind of eating competition. It'll distract your competitors.
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Tagged With farting, farts, private, public, silent
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